Dayamn

Yesterday I had to go home from work because of some kind of seizure. I have yet to figure out what it is... though I believe it's either a weirder form of my migraine or that my migraine has developed into a very, very small (veeeery small mind you) epilepsy. These seizures are sporadic, but relatively short. It's like fainting, just that I never faint completely. Now that I have fainted "properly" during the girugämesh concert I have a way to compare the two incidents, and what I previously thought was just regular fainting-spells seems to be a bit more... sinister? It starts with a period of disorientation, where the time moves slower or in brackets. Like one second I am talking, the next something entirely different is happening. As if several seconds of my time has been cut out. Then my sight darkens from the edges and turns to black and grey with spots. This is where I want to link it to my migraine, because the spots remind me a lot of the pre-migraine state. As this happens I lose the control of my muscles and often sag down but without really noticing before the nearest hard surface is in contact with my head *cough* I also get a taste of metal in my mouth, and the sensation as if my entire body has been treated with electricity. I am often very dizzy, sick and disoriented a long time after these fainting-spells. They never last for long though (the fainting in itself only last for a minute or so, but the before and aftermath can last a bit longer), and before I never viewed it as anything but a bother. But yesterday I had to leave work because I had one of these in the register. That is not okay. Fainting or so in public is not something I wish, especially not during work. So I am trying to get a hang of my doctor to book an appointment. People who know me know how much I HATE the doctor, so now I am taking it seriously. Besides all my joints have been given me a lot of pain lately, so I thought I'd just take it all in one go and be done with doctors for a good while.

Anyway, enough of the hypochondriac-ness now. Over to my actual rant.

I left work yesterday because of this, and still I don't feel well in my body and am really not eager to return to a stressing job. I work at the ice bar today and on Saturdays its hell on earth, you guys can't even imagine (except BB-san, I gather). So I asked my mum about it and she said I was to call in sick, so I did. When I called in I got the message that it was my responsibility to find a back up if I couldn't come in today. Wait what? When did that become my responsibility? I checked my contract and nope, under sickleave there's no mention of having to find a back up at all. So I tried to call my boss twice but she didn't answer, so I tried to get a hang of my OTHER boss, and she didn't answer either. Finally my first boss called me back after several tries and I told her I was not able to come in today. (Personally I am not certain I want to return to work at all until I figure out what these seizures are, but that might take months or weeks so no can do). My boss then wondered whether or not I had called around and asked if anyone else could take over my shift. Again: wait what? THIS IS NOT MY RESPONSIBILITY! I am not even permanently hired, I am just a part time help D: It agitates me that they do not have enough of an establishment that they can handle sickleave. Damn them. Besides, it's the mall-etiquette that every employee have every second Saturday off. Do you guys think I have had every second Saturday off? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! No. I have worked every Saturday since I started. So if I call in sick one Saturday? Damn I have the right to! *haruphs*